Spurious News: Obamas' review of place they live rent-free in Trump's head: "It's the worst place in the world"
INSIDE DONALD TRUMP'S HEAD (Spurious News Network) -- After King Donald Trump published on Truth Social a photo of President Barack and First Lady Michelle Obama standing at the top of the stairs leading to Air Force One, which had been AI-defaced with what looked like inner-city graffiti, it became clear to all that the Obamas live rent-free in Donald Trump's head.
Today, the power couple explained how bad it is to live rent-free in Donald Trump's head.
"He's got us in the worst place in the world," said President Obama. "Michelle says it's not quite as bad as Trump himself is, but she's always been generous."
"No, honey," said Michelle Obama. "Donald Trump is like being stuck in a lit blast furnace that's in a steel mill that's burning down in the middle of a forest fire with nuclear bombs being dropped on it. The apartment in his head that we're in is more like being cut in half and thrown to the lions in the Roman Colosseum if they hadn't been fed for three months. It's bad but not as bad as it could be."
"She's right," said President Obama. "Trump's the Category Nine Hurricane of disastrous presidents. Think of a bad leader in the history of the world and Trump is worse. Trump's evil and incompetent but he thinks he's the perfect president, which makes things worse."
We asked the Obamas to describe the place they live rent-free in Trump's head.
"There's raw sewage two feet deep on the floor," said President Obama.
"He's got rats the size of housecats in there," said Michelle Obama.
"But the rats are actually pretty cool," said President Obama. "They don't want to be in there either, so once we got them out of the sewage and bathed them they turned out to be really sweet and way smarter than Trump is."
"Barack, what are you talking about?" asked Michelle Obama. "The bricks in our fireplace are way smarter than Trump is. And just because the rats are sweet and they have learned to play fetch and shake hands doesn't mean they aren't still rats."
When we asked the Obamas if they'd ever get out of this living arrangement, Michelle shook her head. "No, we've accepted that we're stuck in there until the day he dies. But that won't be long now."
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