Had my first fall yesterday; shattered my confidence re staying in my home alone.

[No Vested Interest]

I'm likely one of the eldest on DU.
Have been using a walker or two canes for a year or two. Shoulders are damaged so range of motion is limited. Can't lift arms above chest.
I only leave the house for doctors' appointments.
My adult children bring in and prepare my meals and assist otherwise as needed.
Fall occurred when arising from my desk chair at computer and legs buckled. Fairly soft landing
I was able to hang onto the desk long enough to pick up phone & call son & daughter; one called my neighbor who came immediately.
Daughter also arrived.
I'm fairly large/heavy -dead weight- and fire department was called to lift me.
Difficult decisions will have to be made.
Husband (deceased) was in nursing home seven years and other daughter lives in nursing care due to a stroke, so I've seen that scene and don't like what I saw. I'd find that way of life very disagreeable.

[lostnfound]

1. That must be scary. A few things to do..

1) Wear an Apple Watch that can automatically dial a loved one or 911 if it detects a fall.
2) Ask your doctor if any medicines you are taking can contribute to falls. Some meds are helpful for some conditions, but the risk of a fall can be significantly increased by them, which may outweigh benefits as we age. Relative risks/probabilties are rarely weighed.
3) See if you can do some leg strengthening or balance exercises. Even while lying in bed, you can strengthen legs with leg lifts or side lifts, which helps with mobility

I’m sorry that you have gone through this. I hope you find a satisfactory solution.

[No Vested Interest]

6. Thanks for advice/hints. I do need an alert monitor; one I had ordered

didn't work in my location, so another needs to be located & obtained.
Legs are fairly strong; impaired shoulders limit lifting self, etc.
Have been taking same meds for several years, but they could be checked on for problems.

[lostnfound]

7. Sending you love, respect and appreciation

You said you think you are ‘one of the eldest’. The beauty of a long life is a real blessing to those of us lucky enough to know the eldest among us. As humans, I think the most beautiful are 1) babies who come in shiny and innocent like a blank canvas; and 2) the eldest who are spiritually rich and absolutely beautiful like a canvas that is near to becoming a masterpiece, with rich layers of life providing depth, subtlety, meaning.

I had the privilege of caring for someone who was in his late eighties, and the life that he lived was endlessly interesting, since i was old enough by then to appreciate what it meant to have experienced history.

At 63 I am not quite a senior, i suppose. But one of my grandmothers and one grandfather was born around 1860. So I always have had a sense of history as if it were day before yesterday, not a million years ago.

I hope you can find things to cherish and enjoy each day, and be consoled that…to be fragile is to be alive, and each day of your shared thoughts is an honest blessing to all of us here.

[GentryDixon]

2. I'm sorry for this

I wish you well, whatever your treatment entails 💕
It's the shits getting old, for sure as I'm there as well. One son who lives 5 hours away, so not a lot of support.
One day at a time. 💜

[GreenWave]

3. There are light exercises such as the 5 Tibetans which may be helpful.

If you see them online just do what you can, meaning you can cheat a little. Go slowly such as 2 or 3 times each different exercise (So after a day you will have done 10-15 in 1 minute or so.) . These 5 have been around for 5,000 + years so they are not without tremendous trial and error.

I am sorry you fell. It happened to me in the front yard, but I had slipped during lawn mowing. The embarrassing part was trying to get up without the neighbors noticing. I had placed boulders near the pecan tree and rolled toward them. Then I had enough height to get up.
if you can sit down, here is an easy one. Sit almost completely down but stop an inch shy, then raise your self up and repeat slowly.
If you need a table for help for this next one it's fine. Slow calf raises on your toes try to stay on top for a few seconds, then slowly 2-3 seconds to go back down, Both of these should see very gradual increases as the weeks go by.

[mountain grammy]

4. Good advice here. Why I subscribe to this forum.

All the best to you and good luck

[applegrove]

5. My dad was big and got rescued by firemen in his assisted

Last edited Sat Jan 10, 2026, 02:36 AM - Edit history (1)

living building when he fell few times. They had a maintenance man in the building and nurses but dad was too large to be lifted by anyone but firemen. Turns out he was tracked by the City of Ottawa, we think, as using up the city's resources so when he was looking into a nursing home months later he got put as a priority and got into the nursing home he wanted. They were like yes, yes, yes to every question my sister asked. Turns out it costs hundreds of dollars for a firestation call, maybe a thousand, and the system in Ottawa wanted him out of a facility that could not handle him and into a nursing home very badly.

So put your name into the nursing home(s) you most want to go to and mention the fire department being called to help you. See if that doesn't get you to rise up the list. Really if your family is there often, as they seem to be, it is not so bad. We had lobster salad, vichyssoise and strawberries and whipped cream outside the nursing home every summer at a picknick table. There were ducks and geese on the river to feed every day. My dad had a prescription for whisky he could have before dinner. My brother and I cooked dinner Sundays and brought it in to my dad's room. We stored a card table and chairs in his room. He had lovely people as private caregivers, just the best people, who teased and joked with him. My dad was happy when he first arrived and started speaking French to the staff which we never knew he could do. All his worries about mobility were instantly solved... every issue a person could have about falling had a solution in a nursing home. The food was plain and good.

Don't think you are going to the other side any time soon. He lived in the nursing home for 7 years, one of my grandmothers lived 22 years in her nursing home. The difference between the care was stark. In my dad's more modern nursing home there were much more fun interests and trying to find ways to make people happy. My grandmother's nursing home didn't have alcohol, Kentucky Fried Chicken day, a strawberry social, a marshmallow roast, a library, games room or WiFi but did have crafts. My dad's nursing home 20 years later had no crafts but all those other things.

In the mean time, ever think of a smart phone as a way to connect to the DU and the internet from a comfy chair? Or a tablet? I use mine all the time. I hardly touch my computer. You get used to the small keyboard.

Don't forget when you are on the internet you are out of whatever room you have in the nursing home and into the ether. I had to move and move and move due to being stalked and the internet kept me grounded in a routine. The DU is wonderful that way. I once lived above a drug dealer and hated it. I didn't want to go outside. I cringed every time I heard a knock on his door. Someone broke into his apartment and beat him up which I could hear. He didn't yell for help. That was awful. But every night, when I got home from work, I would log onto the DU and feel I was elsewhere than in my apartment. I'm sure you'll feel that way in a nursing home when you get on the internet. You'll get the same dopamine hits you get today.

So sorry you fell.