White House Dementia Care Unit Tells Trump He's Designing A Great Big Boat!

[UpInArms]

1. Oh dear gawd

“They’ll be the fastest, the biggest, and by far 100 times more powerful than any battleship ever built,” Trump claimed during the announcement at his Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida.

Whaaaat? The fastest and the biggest and the by far 100 times more powerfulest? Tell us more, President Snake Oil!

[The ships will be] fitted with “guns and missiles at the highest level,” hypersonic weapons, electric rail guns, cruise missiles and the “most sophisticated lasers in the world[.]”

Lasers for weapons that haven’t even been invented yet? This sounds like a ship that’s going to be built in real life!

“The US Navy will lead the design of these ships along with me because I’m a very aesthetic person.”