Had my first fall yesterday; shattered my confidence re staying in my home alone.

[applegrove]

5. My dad was big and got rescued by firemen in his assisted

Last edited Sat Jan 10, 2026, 02:36 AM - Edit history (1)

living building when he fell few times. They had a maintenance man in the building and nurses but dad was too large to be lifted by anyone but firemen. Turns out he was tracked by the City of Ottawa, we think, as using up the city's resources so when he was looking into a nursing home months later he got put as a priority and got into the nursing home he wanted. They were like yes, yes, yes to every question my sister asked. Turns out it costs hundreds of dollars for a firestation call, maybe a thousand, and the system in Ottawa wanted him out of a facility that could not handle him and into a nursing home very badly.

So put your name into the nursing home(s) you most want to go to and mention the fire department being called to help you. See if that doesn't get you to rise up the list. Really if your family is there often, as they seem to be, it is not so bad. We had lobster salad, vichyssoise and strawberries and whipped cream outside the nursing home every summer at a picknick table. There were ducks and geese on the river to feed every day. My dad had a prescription for whisky he could have before dinner. My brother and I cooked dinner Sundays and brought it in to my dad's room. We stored a card table and chairs in his room. He had lovely people as private caregivers, just the best people, who teased and joked with him. My dad was happy when he first arrived and started speaking French to the staff which we never knew he could do. All his worries about mobility were instantly solved... every issue a person could have about falling had a solution in a nursing home. The food was plain and good.

Don't think you are going to the other side any time soon. He lived in the nursing home for 7 years, one of my grandmothers lived 22 years in her nursing home. The difference between the care was stark. In my dad's more modern nursing home there were much more fun interests and trying to find ways to make people happy. My grandmother's nursing home didn't have alcohol, Kentucky Fried Chicken day, a strawberry social, a marshmallow roast, a library, games room or WiFi but did have crafts. My dad's nursing home 20 years later had no crafts but all those other things.

In the mean time, ever think of a smart phone as a way to connect to the DU and the internet from a comfy chair? Or a tablet? I use mine all the time. I hardly touch my computer. You get used to the small keyboard.

Don't forget when you are on the internet you are out of whatever room you have in the nursing home and into the ether. I had to move and move and move due to being stalked and the internet kept me grounded in a routine. The DU is wonderful that way. I once lived above a drug dealer and hated it. I didn't want to go outside. I cringed every time I heard a knock on his door. Someone broke into his apartment and beat him up which I could hear. He didn't yell for help. That was awful. But every night, when I got home from work, I would log onto the DU and feel I was elsewhere than in my apartment. I'm sure you'll feel that way in a nursing home when you get on the internet. You'll get the same dopamine hits you get today.

So sorry you fell.